Let me begin, dear reader, by announcing that I was in court yesterday. I was in court and it was Something’s Shocking. We all know about the Driver’s Responsibility Fee, and how it’s a big bull-rip.

It may be bull-rip and cheese whiz, but I will tell you as sure as I was born in September- It is not dangerous to drive drunk in my county. If an insurance company has to do the job they are paid for, then I am a dis-service to this country; and I quote, “People like you who drive without car insurance are the problem with today’s society.”

Just so that we are jumping off the same point together, please read this excerpt from my Social Work textbook-

There  usually are very narrow limits to what can be accomplished by poor people, minorities, trade unionist, and liberals through elections and the legislative process. The costs of running for office are enormous for average people in terms of time and money, and the impediments to change built into the legislative process make it very hard to sustain a pressure-group coalition or legislative social movements that does not have a great amount of money and patience.”  (Domhoff, 1990 p.260)

Guess who’s representing me in the grand scheme of politics? My poor, poor, court appointed attorney. He is a good man.

I was in court because I had a ticket for not having car insurance. I didn’t have car insurance because I support four people off a $600 per month budget. The car needed repairs. No car means no way to school. No school, means stuck on nasty welfare until a politician decides we are “undeserving poor.” So I sunk all my student loans into fixing the car that these two assholes “Girled” me on last winter; and sold me a lemon. I was scammed bad on that car, but I learned my lesson. Now it’s broke down and I’m still paying out the nose for it.

Luckily for me, and everyone else in the courthouse that day, my darling Auntie was with me; or else I’d probably be held in Guantanamo right now.

For three and a half hours we patiently listened to cases. Just about every single one involved alcohol. The majority were drunk driving, or getting drunk and beating up someone on the sidewalk; or getting drunk and when his friends tried to take him to the ER for an overdose and he trashed the hospital; or getting drunk and beating up girlfriends; or getting drunk, smashing the car and leaving the scene of an accident; or getting drunk while making Christmas cookies (really?) and then getting pulled over with twice the legal amount of alcohol in her system; cases like that for hours.

The whole time the judge was so understanding. She must be an alcoholic because for every person she had words of advice, and encouragement. The prosecuting attorney was dressed like a bartender in a tight black satin pants and jacket. I could see her reading the MSN news on her homepage, checking her e-mails, writing a letter to request time off (she looked overworked!) and reading about “herbal hot-flash remedies” right through everyone’s cases. Every now and then someone would say her name, and she would say “the people agree”. Then she entered a number in a blue box and went back to surfing the web.

One guy was being charged with providing alcohol to minors because his 16 year old had a bonfire party and everyone there was underage and wasted. But he didn’t do any jail time either. The judge said it was an “honest mistake.”  She could see how he was making amends for his family.

The guy who crashed his car drunk and then left the scene of the accident; she called him “Sweetie” said she could see how that mistake could happen. He should try to be in school or college right now and help get his life straight!

I’m thinking, “Sweet! I was totally sober. It’s a victimless crime. It’s just a matter of me being broke all the time.”

Oh no. Apparently I needed to be drunk in order to earn sympathy. The judge had nothing nice to say to me at all. She told me that I obviously had no regard for the rules of society. She told me that it was a cruel injustice to put people at risk by not driving with car insurance. She looked me in the eye, pointed at me and told me in no uncertain terms that I am the problem with society today. She said that I’m not very smart for being in college, and maybe I should try using my intelligence to keep my car insurance paid. I am not making any of this up. It is not an exaggeration.

F.Y.I.- No fault insurance means that when a person is in a car accident then their insurance company is responsible for all the damages. Your insurance company can sue their insurance company for reimbursement. For example, If I hit you with my car, and I don’t have insurance, then the company who you’ve been paying hundreds of dollars to every month to has to use that money to fix you and your car. That’s the reason people have insurance. The insurance company invests that money you pay them into stocks so that in case something really bad happens the company has enough money to fix it. My lack of money has no effect on you. Your car insurance company will pout, because they can’t sue another insurance company. They have to sue me (and I am being sued for $1900 by an insurance company for a Cadillac that has no damages on it anywhere) and I don’t have all that much blood left to squeeze.

But if I were driving around drunk, beating up women, and damaging people’s property I would be in a much better light in the court’s eyes.

“You are the problem with society today!” Me? Really? I’m I all that’s standing in the way of global domination by a corporate scam? I didn’t pay my car insurance and the whole society went under? Wow. I guess I have a lot more impact than I gave myself credit for.

I spoke with my lawyer on his way out of the building. If he hadn’t been there to have already made arrangements with the prosecuting attorney, then I would be in jail for up to a year right now. He said that he thought the whole Driver’s Responsibility Fee was bullock’s too. But the state made $9 million last year from fines, so…

Drunk driving carries a maximum of 90 days. But no car insurance? 1 year.

I am flabbergasted! Flabbergasted and confused. Again. Again? And again, and again, and again.

Please comment!