It’s been a while. Honestly, I gave up writing anything for a while. That did not last. Nothing does. Such as…

I was employed at Tribar Mfg. That’s a auto parts manufacturing plant in Howell, MI. I was a receptionist extraordinaire. I was the left hand of the Human Resources Director. I had IT! I had a big-kid job and as long as I didn’t quit, I was going to be off that welfare tit for good. I invested in second-hand professional clothes. I took my crazy lady pills every morning. I could have peed in a cup and passed the test. I got my hair trimmed and my eyebrows waxed. I wore only one pair of earrings, and they were in my earlobes. I showed up to work 20 minutes early each day even though I wouldn’t get paid for it. I smiled a lot. I used my most pleasant Sally Field voice on the phone. I worked hard. I made up work to do because being a receptionist is limited work if the phone isn’t ringing.

Then one day… my boss stopped being nice to me. She stopped handing me work to do. When she did, she would toss a piece of paper on my desk, and walk away without a looking at me or saying a single word. I was confused. This lead to me being insecure. I spoke to the former receptionist. She offered palatable advice, but not much more. Everyone was super nice to me except for my boss.

I kept on keeping on. I was sure that most people hated their work and felt insecure around their bosses too. It must mean that I was becoming much more normal.

I felt like a real American. Okay, so I was credit card debt, car payment, and a mortgage away from American Utopia; but I was pointed in the right direction. Soon I would have enough money to go into debt for things. It must be true. I had a lunch bag that Velcro across the top. I had a work mug for coffee. The regular business clients had made personal jokes with me. I could appease millionaires and applicants with equal grace. I was trained, tagged, and ready.

Then one day, a day that was one week short of the magical all-benefits-included-90-day-and-$150-short-of-qualifying-for-unemployment mile marker, I was pulled into the CEO’s office. Neither the CEO or Human Resources Director looked me in the eye to tell me that the company was heading in a new direction. Solemn faces mumbled how they were so sorry, but it just wasn’t going to work out. Shifty eyes over mouths that said they would write me a great letter of recommendation for my next position that would surely come soon.

Happy Halloween weekend!

I tried to ride a wave of upbeat. I ran into an ex-coworker who told me that receptionist whom I replaced after she had been promoted, then left for a back surgery two weeks after I started; was back in the receptionist position. Perhaps I was cheaper than a temp? I eked through the Holidays. I was feeling pretty useless. The more useless I felt, the less I could do, and the less I did the more useless I felt. The psychiatrist decided I must need more pills and higher dosages of them. The next thing I knew, I was unable to stay awake for more than a few hours at a time, and I entered the overweight color on the BMI chart. I had not weighed that much in my life without being in my third trimester of pregnancy! I’ve been pregnant three times! Everything was moving in the wrong direction. Something had to give.

Then just before St. Patrick’s Day I saw a NOW HIRING MANAGERS sign in front of The Salvation Army.

Perhaps a new direction for Kayla?